On behalf of our board and staff, I am delighted to unveil the Tyler Clementi Foundation’s brand new logo! In response to our organization’s dramatic growth, which is in large part due to the support of our generous and loyal donors, we embarked on a journey to revise our logo. The final design, pictured above, incorporates Tyler at the center, just as he is at the heart of our story. In the past five years since Tyler’s passing, change has been the only constant in my life. I have embraced not only my own personal evolution, but also that of the organization that my husband Joseph and I founded in our son’s name. Our logo has been a growing process since our founding in 2010. Those of you who have supported our organization from the beginning may remember the Roman Handshake, our “Live = Let Live” tagline, and our teal and gold stripes. Throughout all of these, I always felt that something was lost in the translation. For me, our new logo is a strong statement of who we are, why we are, and what we do. The new logo communicates everything I have been trying to say in one iconic, youthful and universal symbol. The logo includes Tyler’s initials, held together in the form of the universal “Power On” button – a nod to our work to end online (as well as offline) bullying. We have retained the color gold to reflect the golden rule, which continues to guide our organization’s values.

There are many layers involved in the problems caused by bullying. Bullying involves a power imbalance between the target and the bully, the shame and stigma that prevents victims from reporting and seeking help, the silence of bystanders, and the brave actions of Upstanders. Both cyberbullying and in-person harassment continue to be major issues that we are working on changing. People are targeted for bullying due to their race, gender expression or identity, sexual orientation, disability, religion or other difference; and no matter the reason we want to help!

Click the video above to listen to a recording of our online webinar where we explain more of the thought process behind the new design.

We also invite you to share your thoughts or to make a gift in celebration!

My son Tyler is the reason I, along with my husband Joseph and son James, have dedicated the last five years of our lives to sharing our personal tragedy with the world. The loss that we experienced in September 2010 devastated us and permanently transformed our family, our lives and our purposes. We could not go back in time and change the choice Tyler made, even though it was the only thing I wanted; the only thing that would be able to make me whole again. I have spent years learning to live with the loss and pain, and it continues to be a learning process. The one thing I know is that no family should have to endure a tragedy like ours.

As alone as Tyler must have felt in his final days, his experiences were one of many. Many people opened up to me about their experiences being bullied, and I began to see just how widespread and rampant a problem bullying is in our culture. When we began the Tyler Clementi Foundation our goal was to help as many people from as many diverse situations and backgrounds as possible. Inclusion and reaching through our differences to connect and support each other has been a fundamental goal of mine. I found that Tyler’s story had a universal quality that many people could relate to in some way. There was something about Tyler’s story that spoke to so many people I met. For this reason, we have decided to keep Tyler at the center of our mission, our programming and our identity as an organization.

One afternoon a few weeks ago, I was sitting down for a cup of coffee with a friend whose opinion I cherish, and I shared the new logo with her and awaited her thoughts. She immediately commented that the “C” in the initials looked to her like arms outstretched, embracing Tyler with a loving hug. I have since heard this interpretation from a number of sources. It was so interesting to me because this wasn’t our intention, and it never came up during the design process. I think this is another layer of meaning to our logo that makes it even richer and more heartfelt. I am excited to share this logo with the world, and look forward to seeing how it impacts even more people.

This year’s Upstander Legacy Celebration was our biggest and best ever.

Enjoy a recap of this beautiful evening! Maybe you will even see some folks you know in this video.

Please consider sharing this video on social media and consider making a donation to this great cause at tylerclementi.org/donate!

The Tyler Clementi Foundation is proud to partner with Share My Lesson. If you are an educator, join today and see what other teachers across the world are using to reach their students.

Read about the #Day1 Campaign and other resources for your classroom here.

In 2010, New York state signed into law the Dignity for All Students Act. In an effort to help reduce bullying, the law relies on school officials to keep track and report all bullying incidents, including those that happen online. Unfortunately, a recent analysis of the reports gathered from New York schools shows that this is not capturing the full scope of the problem.

According to a Times Union analysis of the data, 75 percent of New York State schools reported that there were zero cyberbullying incidents. Senator Carl Marcellino, the chairman of the State Education Committee, stated that “to believe so few districts have experienced these types of incidents would be foolish.”

While it is fortunate that New York state officials are trying to make changes to the Act to make it more effective, I believe it highlights why state and national laws are not enough to address the issues of bullying, harassment and humiliation. According to a recent national survey conducted by the Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network (GLSEN), over a quarter of schools in states with anti-bullying laws have no bullying policy in place. In schools where there are bullying policies, 38.7% do not specify protections for students based on real or perceived sexual orientation. This leaves a huge amount of students left feeling like they do not have the support of their schools if they are the victims of bullying.

For these reasons, I believe the issue needs to be addressed on multiple fronts, not just the legislative level. Students, parents, and educators need to work together to make sure that everyone knows what type of behavior is unacceptable and that their communities can support them. That is why the programs created by the Tyler Clementi Foundation aim to fill a gap in the sector by providing a range of interventions and approaches.

Programs like the Upstander Speaker Series and #Day1 Campaign make conversations around bullying much more local and personal. Having a speaker like Jane Clementi come into a community to share her story, or using the #Day1 program on the first day of school helps confront the issues in the environments where they actually occur. To make sure these programs are as effective as possible, TCF also created the Tyler Clementi Institute for Internet Safety at New York Law School to conduct research, and provide analysis of bullying prevention. TCF does realize the importance of bullying policy which is why the Foundation supports passage of the Tyler Clementi Higher Education Anti-Harassment Act, to encourage college campuses to have stronger anti-bullying policies.

While each of these programs have their strengths, it is when they are used in tandem that real progress can be made.

The Internet Safety Conference, to be held at New York Law School on October 3-4, 2015, is an unprecedented gathering of policy makers, political and business leaders, attorneys, social scientists, academics, teachers, students, and nonprofit advocates, all focused on the conference’s theme: combatting cyber-harassment in all its forms. At this conference, New York Law School will launch a first-of-its-kind direct outreach pro bono initiative that will help victims of online harassment obtain justice, the The Tyler Clementi Institute for CyberInternet Safety at New York Law School.

Speakers include:

• U.S. Congresswoman Kathleen Rice (D-NY)
• U.S. Congressman Mark Pocan (D-WI)
• Kathleen McGee, Chief, Internet Bureau, Office of the Attorney General of the State of New York
• Elisa D’Amico, Founder, Cyber Civil Rights Legal Project at K&L Gates
• Jane Clementi, Founder, Tyler Clementi Foundation
• Danielle Keats Citron, University of Maryland School of Law, Author of Hate Crimes in Cyberspace
• Ann Bartow, University of New Hampshire School of Law
• Frank Pasquale, University of Maryland School of Law, Author of The Black Box Society
• Lawrence Newman, Chief, Domestic Violence Unit, Manhattan DA’s Office
• Jacqueline Beauchere, Chief Online Safety Officer, Microsoft
• Marissa Shorenstein, President, AT&T New York
• Carrie Goldberg, C.A. Goldberg, PLLC
• Holly Jacobs, Founder, Cyber Civil Rights Initiative
• Lois Herrera, Chief Executive Officer, Office of Safety and Youth Development, New York City Department of Education
• Mark Hatzenbuehler, Assistant Professor, Mailman School of Public Health, Columbia University
• Remington Gregg, Legislative Counsel, Human Rights Campaign
• Nancy Gifford, Senior Director, Law & Policy, iKeepSafe.org

The documentary Breaking the Silence highlights the alarming rate of bullying and how society can combat it. The documentary, directed and produced by Frank Gigante, features individuals from New Jersey directly impacted by bullying. Appearances in the film include anti-bullying expert NJ State Trooper & President of The New Jersey Center For School Safety (NJASRO) Gregory M. Williams and bullying awareness activists Joseph & Jane Clementi, the parents of the late Tyler Clementi.

“Our children deserve us as parents and guardians to do all we can and learn as much as possible about bullies and bullying. Our support, education and love will ensure they get through any issues of bullying confidently and more importantly, safely,” said Frank Gigante.

Bullying is a serious problem faced by youth today. It does not matter if the bullying takes place in the school, neighborhood or on the internet. It can lead to serious problems for both the victim and the perpetrator. The documentary focuses upon the fact that bullying, hate crimes and cyberbullying is extremely distressing and harmful to any individual, but that it is particularly more so for those vulnerable in society.

Breaking the Silence was written by Frank Gigante & Kevin Shipp. The film’s music, including “Crying in the Rain,” was performed by Sicily Knight and includes acting performance from Kat Gueli. The film’s Executive producer Mike Sciarra has been a fundamental part of the project. The film was directed and produced by Frank Gigante.

The film was selected to screen at Jersey City’s Golden Door Film Festival.

The launch of Breaking the Silence helps raise funds for Gigante’s future Anti-Bullying fiction film called Broken Silence.

We are excited to have the Tyler Clementi Foundation as a partner for International Child Protection Month this September and are heavily promoting the #Day1 Campaign as one of the important actions that adult leaders can take to protect and empower the young people in their lives. I wish you could have been with me a few weeks ago when Jill Gallo, Cabrillo College Extension Coordinator, read the #Day1 Declaration to 37 middle and high school students in our Youth Leadership program. The students listened intently and nodded their heads. Jill then added, “If you adopt and uphold these values, it will serve you well here and throughout your lives.”

Several of the students, who are going to be leading clubs at their schools, asked for a copy so they could read it aloud to start off the school year. We are also recommending #Day1 as an important step in stopping workplace bullying. During a TalentCulture TChat radio show and pre-interview on video last week, I was asked what leadership in companies could do to create a culture that promotes safety and respect instead of bullying and harassment.

I explained that having leaders read and uphold the Tyler Clementi Foundation’s  #Day1 Declaration is a very important first step. TalentCulture is an online community of human resource professionals and has over 78,000 followers on Twitter. Many were saying that having such a clear and specific action to take is truly valuable. We are including the #Day1 Campaign as a recommended resource in our blog posts and articles about bullying and harassment prevention as well as child protection. These have gone to over 15,000 safety advocates around the world: How to Recognize and Stop Workplace Bullying and Harassment and #Day1 Campaign to Stop Bullying, Harassment, and Prejudice Before It Starts. #Day 1 is a powerful campaign, and we are proud to have Kidpower be part of it!

The Tyler Clementi Foundation’s #Day1 Campaign was created around the idea that no one should be made to feel as though they are worth less than the community around them, regardless of how they look, who they love, or where they’re from. That is why it is it just as important to see #Day1 succeed internationally as well as in our own nation’s schools and workplaces. Everyone around the world deserves to feel respected and safe. However, some countries have norms and even laws that foster bullying and hatred. But we must stay true to the goals for #Day1 while being empathic to those who are in very challenging situations.

In some countries, there are anti-LGBT propaganda laws that directly conflict with the goals and message of the campaign. These laws, claiming to protect children, do harm rather than good as they isolate vulnerable LGBT people and help foster stigmas against them. While these laws make their respective countries prime candidates for the #Day1 program, it also means that promoting the campaign in these countries could be dangerous for people who believe in our campaign but would be putting their lives and freedom at risk by speaking up. In countries like Nigeria, Russia and Pakistan, simply mentioning that anti-LGBT bullying is wrong, could result in prosecution or physical violence. We have learned that #Day1 proponents in Nigeria and Pakistan would like to honor the #Day1 idea while making a statement that is less specific but still not specific of any group. While we respect the political reality in these countries and the risks our leaders are taking, we have asked them to not call a censored version of our campaign, “#Day1.” It isn’t #Day1 unless it addresses a main form of bullying! Instead, we encourage them to make their own statements in ways that are as inclusive as possible.

If I lived in a country where the laws and culture were such that speaking up about LGBT issues could leave me in jail for many years and put me at a high risk of immediate death, I want to believe that I would speak up anyway. But to be really honest, I’m glad that I don’t have to be tested in this way. I want to honor people who take a more gradual approach while we at the Tyler Clementi Foundation stay true to our core values.

Help us get #Day1 (an inclusive#Day1) into schools, workplaces and teams around the world. Creating change where it is safer can begin to lead to change in places where it is more dangerous.

Go here to download the declaration and pledge.

You can also consider donating to#Day1 here.

Browsing through the Josh Fairbanks YouTube channel, one will find an assortment of amusing videos mostly consisting of Josh performing harmless pranks on his eleven-year-old son Logan. Each of the videos shows how fun loving and silly the father-son team are. However one video in particular stands out as very different from the rest. On July 7th, Josh and Logan posted a much more serious video featuring Logan speaking directly to YouTube viewers about the mean-spirited and cruel comments about him that cyber-bullies had left on previous video uploads.

One by one he reads off the awful comments making fun of his appearance, intelligence, and sexuality, with some even wishing him dead. The reason he made this video? “To encourage other people to not bully people online” and “to encourage other people that have been bullied to not let words hurt them.” It’s an incredibly noble and brave cause for an eleven-year-old. By reading the mean comments about himself to the viewer we can hear just how cutting and heartless the comments are. It also shows the viewer that these comments are not just text on a screen but real words that carry real emotional weight and consequences, just like the words we use when speaking with someone face to face. His message has rightfully resonated with much of the web as his video received viral buzz in the week after it was posted. The video has since been viewed over one million times.

The bravery that Logan exhibited in the video is the type of behavior that the Tyler Clementi Foundation loves to encourage. By directly addressing the issue and speaking to viewers Logan was acting as a true Upstander. He took the time to show that malicious words shouldn’t be ignored and took a clear and solid stance against them. By offering compassion to anyone else that has been the target of mean words he shows that the video isn’t just about him, but about the greater problem of cyber-bullying in general.

We want to applaud Logan Fairbanks for his bravery and setting a great example for his peers, that cyber-bullying is cruel and shouldn’t be tolerated. You can be an Upstander as well, by promoting the #Day1 Campaign in your school or workplace. No one should ever have to feel alone or targeted.

Three years after Tyler Clementi ended his young life, Jane and Joe Clementi, Tyler’s mother and father, along with Tyler’s oldest brother James, sit down with Faith in America founder Mitchell Gold to discuss their loss. The family talks openly about ways that other parents and young people can learn from what happened to Tyler to prevent other tragedies. While working to create a more loving and welcoming world, the family has been blessed with Mitchell’s friendship and insight.

Mitchell Gold is the co-founder and CEO of award winning and internationally recognized home furnishings company Mitchell Gold + Bob Williams. Seven years ago he co-founded Faith in America with former Methodist minister Jimmy Creech. The organization’s mission is to educate people about the harm caused by outdated, misguided and ill-informed religious teachings towards innocent and vulnerable gay teens. Mitchell has been credited with having the courage to “start difficult conversations” about religion with a wide array of people from the news media, politicians and everyday families. In 2008, he edited CRISIS: 40 Stories Revealing the Personal, Social and Religious Pain and Trauma of Growing Up Gay in America. It was released a year ago in paperback as Youth In Crisis, and has been a great help to the Clementi family.

Mitchell encouraged the Clementi’s, saying, “Think about what you want a gay kid who feels ashamed, broken, bullied to learn if they go to your site. Think about what you want parents to learn.”

Mitchell: What would you say to Tyler if he were sitting with you?
Joseph: Tyler, I miss you every hour of every day. Instead of taking the action you took I wish you would have taken your tenaciousness and used it to survive. I know you are at peace and with God now, yet I wish you were here. I know I can’t understand the feelings of isolation and hopelessness that must have driven you to act as you did. You were the child who seemed to have it all together yet underneath you were suffering.
I wish I could have impressed upon you more that there is no problem, no issue, no act that you could commit or could be committed on you, that would
have ever diminished my love and support for you and who you are. I thought you knew and understood that. I am profoundly saddened that this wasn’t clearly communicated or understood properly, and wish that I could have changed that.
James: In this life so many things happen to challenge us and hurt us, and you have felt more pain for being who you are in a world that doesn’t understand, and for having the wrong kind of people in your life just as you were beginning to find yourself. You never should have had to doubt your own worth and value, and I wish you would have known it all along. In your absence I have nothing but a void that will never be filled. You are gone, but the love and connection that I feel for you is forever. I don’t agree with your choices, and I will remain confused and hurt by them. I would have changed this world to create one where I could be you every day. You didn’t give me that chance, but in all of the people that I’ve spoken to and worked with since your passing I see a great need for change. I will be doing my part to change this world for them. But you don’t know how much I wish I was making changes that you could still benefit from.

Mitchell: What do you want to say to any lesbian, gay, bisexual or Transgender (LGBT) kid out there listening, especially ones who are frightened, who have been taught that being gay or acting on it is a sin?
Joseph: If you have been taught by your faith community or perhaps your family and friends that your sexual orientation is a sin, consider this – you were made the way you are by God for a reason. Being gay is not a sin. If you are afraid and are in an environment that is not accepting, please realize that there are a lot of people who want to help. Seek the help of those people through national and regional LGBT organizations.
Jane: You are perfectly and wonderfully made in God’s image. God does not make mistakes and you were created by a faithful, loving and compassionate God, who loves you very much, just as you are. You are not broken or inferior….it is not a sin to be gay. Find a supportive network of friends and family that can encourage you and give you true and accurate information, always maintaining your safety and protection.
James: Hang in there. Stay strong. There is nothing wrong with you. You deserve to love yourself and accept yourself fully. You are
not sinful. Know that anyone who has ever told you that about yourself or
someone else who is LGBT is wrong. You are entitled to support and love from
other people in your life. If you feel like you are alone with it, I promise
you you’re not. There are people in your life who love you and will support
you. You don’t have to go through life with such a big part of who you are
remaining a secret. Never be ashamed. There is love and support out there. I
urge you to seek it out, no matter how scary it is. Please give yourself the
chance to be truly happy and free in your own skin.

Mitchell: What do you want to say to any parent of an LGBT kid so they never have to go through what you have?
Joseph: If you suspect that you are the parent of an LGBT kid or know that you are, the way you react will have a positive or negative effect on the life of your child. The way you react is important so that there is a positive outcome. When your child comes out to you, it’s important for them to know that they are accepted. They need to know that they are not broken and there is nothing to be “fixed”. Any child or youngster taking that step to come out is putting themselves at risk. Parents should embrace their children unreservedly and their sexual orientation no matter what it is. That is how they will know they are ok. That is how they will know they did not make a mistake by taking the risk to come out. That is how they know that you love them.
Jane: It is important to remain focused on what is important
– the fact that you love your child and you want what is best for them. As parents you also need to have support and correct, accurate information so that you can best help, protect, assist and most importantly show your unconditional love for your children. If you are struggling some basic information would be helpful. Sexual orientation is not a choice. Your child did not just “choose” this. It is not something that can be changed. By holding to these false ideas you are causing great emotional and psychological harm to your child which research shows might lead to destructive physical injury as well as great emotional wounds. Family Acceptance Project is a great
resource for parents who are struggling with many questions.
James: The thing that I most feared before coming out was telling my parents and having to anticipate what their reaction would be. There are many ways that you can make this easier for your child. Make it
clear in your words and actions that you love your child no matter what, and
that you will support them no matter what. Bring up LGBT friends or
acquaintances you have and speak about them in an affirming light. If you’re
watching TV together and marriage equality is being debated on the news or a
gay character shows up on a sitcom, take a moment to say something supportive
and let your child know that they are safe with you. Don’t wait for a crisis to hit, constantly look for new ways and times to bring up your unconditional love and support.

Mitchell: What do you want to say to any parent of a straight kid so their kid is not reckless in how they treat LGBT kids?
Joseph: Set up a precedent of inclusiveness and acceptance in your home by taking our Upstander Pledge. Print it out and put it up on your refrigerator. As parents our interests are in raising our children to be the best that they can be. Part of being the best is to establish in our children a sense of fairness in how we treat others. Your kids are going to meet people in their lives who are different from them. You need to reinforce that while we have differences, our similarities are much more significant. LGBT kids may be different from your kids in whom they are attracted to, what they look like, how they choose to dress and whom they choose to love. The important thing is that we are more similar than we are different. Teach your kids that outward appearances are not a judge of a person’s character. Encourage them to get to know LGBT kids because they can learn from them as well as anybody else. Parents also need to tell their straight kids that LGBT kids are a vulnerable group – vulnerable to hurting themselves. Teach your child to interact positively with LGBT kids and all kids because simply put, that works better for everybody.
Jane: As parents we should be teaching our children to be compassionate, kind, gentle and caring towards all people. We are all different from each other; this is what makes each of us special. We need to embrace our diversity no matter what the difference….race, religion, gender identity and/or sexual orientation. You need to show your children with your words as well as with your actions….your children are smart, they are watching. Your disrespectful or negative comments, snide remarks or even facial expressions to LGBT people (or even your silence….silence sometimes speaks louder than words) have an even deeper effect on people. You need to set a good example for your children. Words hurt and have consequences. Parents should use words to build others up, show respect and be inclusive.
James: Your child is very aware of your words and behavior. Kids pay attention and they learn from you about how to treat other people. That’s a huge responsibility. So make it clear that LGBT people are deserving of respect and dignity, and that any bullying, harassment or assaults will not be tolerated by you. Regardless of your own personal feelings about homosexuality, you must recognize that your child’s LGBT classmates are someone’s child, someone’s sibling, someone’s friend. That kid has every right to go to school feeling as safe and respected as your own child does.

Mitchell: What do you want to say to a straight kid who might not have been brought up to respect other LGBT kids?
Joseph: It’s very simple, live equal and let live. Treat others the way you want to be treated. If you are a youngster and have LGBT folks in your school or wherever you interact with others, you need to be especially sensitive to their feelings. If you come from an environment where you have not been taught to respect gay people’s feelings, or even to disrespect them I would say you have to make up your own mind. You have the
power to determine how you will treat people. That is within your control. Your interactions can have lasting effects on LGBT kids who are still wrestling with their identity or their acceptance at home, or in their faith communities. You never know at what point a person may be in their life in that regard and to simply refuse to engage in name calling and negative activities is the least you can do. You would do better for both of you to engage in a positive way. Build each other up. Resist the tendency to tear somebody down. You want to be cool? Make Kindness Cool.
Jane: As with everyone you should be respectful, kind and considerate to all. You have nothing to fear from an LGBT person…they will not harm you…it is not contagious…you cannot be taught to be “gay” nor is it something that you can learn. Nothing can cause or make you change who you are, it is just one more attribute that makes you, you and them, them. Just remember, all human beings possess dignity and are all worthy of kindness and respect. So just be true to your character, do what you have been taught, what you know to be true and good …be the kind, caring thoughtful person you were created to be.
James: I recognize that it is hard to respect something that you not only don’t understand, but you may have even been taught it is bad or wrong. But the reality is, there are LGBT students that sit in your classrooms, whether you know it or not. There is a good chance that one of your friends, family members, or someone in your community is LGBT, whether they have told you or not. Your words and your actions have a direct impact on
these people; even something that you think is a joke can be incredibly painful for them. Why make a choice to be cruel, threatening or unkind when you can just be nice to people? No one deserves to suffer for someone else’s ignorance. And I would also challenge you to learn why LGBT people are deserving of respect. If you actually got to know someone who is LGBT, you would quickly realize that they are people like all other people.